Simple Tips

March 31, 2008 | Print

Another Word for Please

Every day we lead our toddlers and preschoolers through their routines–get dressed, put on shoes, wash hands, clean up toys, and so on.

We often say, “Please put your truck back on the shelf” or “It’s time to wash hands” or “Let’s put on your pajamas.” From our children’s Waldorf teachers we’ve learned a new approach–You may.

“You may wash your hands” feels strong, supportive, and less optional. We’re engaging our kids in the process, without nagging or asking.

If they remain distracted, we give them a moment (if we have one) and then get them started.

“I’ve turned on the water, you may get the soap. How many bubbles can you make?”

“Oh look, here are your red socks. I’ll put them on your feet and you’ll have red toes.”

When we’re tired and less creative, we hang in there the best we can, giving ourselves space to regroup as needed. We notice that “you may” feels empowering when we say it, and lightens our efforts to manage the task at hand.

More ideas on getting kids to follow our lead: The Less Cooperative Toddler.

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